Emotional Reactions to the Diagnosis
Learning you have cancer is a life-changing experience for individuals, who now has to confront their own mortality, the rigors of treatment and the uncertainty of the outcome. They may have good days and bad days, that is, days when they feel strong and ready to fight the disease and other days, when they feel overwhelmed and frightened. The children of diagnosed patients can also experience this shifting emotional state. Teens may express anger, optimism or detachment at different times. Adult children may feel depressed, hopeful or helpless, in turn. All of these emotions are normal and should be acknowledged as part of the experience of having a loved one with a serious illness. Matters that seemed to be important in the past seem less critical as the family begins to focus on the person that is ill and what the person means to each individual member. The main concern should be to find ways to offer practical emotional and physical support to the ill parent.
Talk Openly About Emotions
Many families are shocked and fearful after learning their parent has a serious disease. These emotions can cause family members to shut down, fearful about bothering others about their questions and concerns. When this occurs, it only serves to make the family atmosphere more anxious and under stress. Parents from past eras or different cultures may have particular problems expressing their fears. Although some families are not comfortable expressing emotions, try to get past this reservation and open up about your feelings. Encourage the parent to express his or her feelings, as well. In this way, emotions will be out in the open and others can provide support as it is needed.
Educate Yourself
Learn as much as you can about the disease and recommended treatments from cancer-related Internet sites or from books at your local library. This information will allow you to understand the procedures that your parent is undergoing. Internet forums or support groups can put you in touch with others whose family members are dealing with the same diagnosis.
Be An Advocate For Your Parent
Your parent may become overwhelmed by the amount of information he or she receives. Scheduling and remembering appointments can be a burden when the patient is not feeling well from treatment. Take over these tasks for your parent, making notes and organizing appointments so that the parent can concentrate on getting well. Make sure that the parent is getting the correct treatment, as prescribed, that medications are taken as directed and that the patient is eating and sleeping properly. These small actions can make treatment a little easier on the patient.
Offer Practical Assistance
Driving your parent to appointments, picking up supermarket items and helping with laundry or housecleaning can make the burden of treatment less exhausting. If you can’t do these chores yourself, hire someone to do them. Grocery delivery services are available in many larger communities. Relieving the parent of these small chores can help them preserve their energy for more important things.
Share Little Luxuries
Take the time to spend a day at the beach, a pedicure, an afternoon at the movies or other small pleasure that the parent enjoys. These escapes from the rigors of treatment can create special moments that make the experience less taxing.
A parent’s diagnosis can be an opportunity to bring family members together for a common goal. Helping the parent also help to reduce your own anxiety about treatment and the prognosis for the future.
from CellMark Biopharma http://www.cellmarkbiopharma.com
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